my last christmas in Berrien Springs...

1ft.

2ft.

3ft. full of white

Sheek as I watch the snow flutter

beneath the streetlight

While inside I can hear the distant sounds

of carol being sung

for the 20th time

here I am again

once upon a time...

it's not the obsession

over her looks

but the fading impact from the punches

of my words

to stir her sky

How when I tell her

She's beautiful

it doesn't mean anything

anymore.

No matter how many hearts

or eyes she has

if its not the right one

it's not the right one

She wants what she wants

while from under her nose

i quietly slip out the back door

for a moment

waiting for her to realize

i'm gone.

Like that memory

The memory of where you last placed the remote

"Where did I put my car keys?"

ode to WASTE OF PAINT...

sometimes i feel like the books i read and the poetic observations i make on the world around me are a pathetic compensation for my own lack of self-identity.
Everything I make is trite and cheap and a waste of paper, of ink, and time. In the end my art envelopes my being like a malicious blanket trapping my every escape route inside this marry-go-round identity quest.
You can see me fighting to breathe but i never get out.

This beautiful woman walked past me the other day
with the saddest smile when i said "hey..."
i wonder what in her life was going wrong

she said she get's so stressed she wishes she could just crawl up in a dark hole...

so there's this girl that passes by me everyday and smiles, i think she likes me, but I can't think of a good conversation starter.

i mean i made a joke about her pee dance and we laughed but that's it.

discoveries...

Sometimes you need to let go of your control over a situation, a situation or a relationship. And hand it over to chance and circumstance. Those confusing motherfuckers. Their confusing as hell and don't always do what you want. But sometimes it's good to let them take control of situation, it might be more stressful but it's often what you need. Often.. sometimes...

Home Sweet Home

Coming back home

I feel wedged between my old persona

And the frontiersman forging a new path

Through muddy terrain

This position puts hearts to sleep

Old furnished smells

Running races through time

Smiles burnt like coffee steins

On rusted dimes

Treasured paintings

Old album records

Minds ripped apart

As if peach, cardigan sweaters

The truth scales walls

As tall as giraffe necks

To escape its prison cell

Filthy Vacuums

The sun rises
Then the moon takes control
Then within our eyes
Looks to close
In Licentious eyes
It looks to close
I grabbed a life
And watched it die the other day
Insects they call them
But under Hiroshimas’s breathe
It told me
My eyes were vacuums
Filthy Vacuums
Stuffed to their seams

So did the horse in that cage
The homeless beggar
As I passed his trey
The ghosts from the Amazon
The decapitated ghosts from Iraq
The stranded teen violated
In the back of a greyhound bus
The zombie roaming

Her senior citizen home

Tiananmen Square
Nigeria
Ethiopia
Baltimore
America
Africa
My soul

And so the sun and moon
Find closer from our eyes
So they can see it in dissipation
With a tease of daredevilry

Unfortunate
They can only see the sea churn
Songs from birds past
The grass tangling its legs around the winds
And stars smiling from a clear Sunday night

The sun and Moon
Bargain to trade their eyes for mine
But I pick up the call on my cell phone
A motion to a passerby

Aa JOBday ATin THE publicDAIRY

A heard of cattle in stalls
Crowds of people in lines
The taskmaster coerces them forward
The greeter makes them wait
The police deepen their voice
To make them move faster
They use stun guns
They use brutality
They use brutality
Cries from irritation
Cries from irritation
Movement coerced from mindless
Obedience
I watch lines move drudgingly
I move with them
In the lines
With drudgery

,is to the Brain, what the Heart said

Thinking with her booty

And not her head

Is to the brain, what the heart said

By now

I'm almost dead

Is what the heart

To the brain

Said

The loud trains whiz by her head so fast she can't think

So in her bed

Is where men sink

Stop! stop!

Someone call the cops!

There's been a homicide!

Her self-reflection was just shot dead

Were there any witnesses?

Well, it was just witnessed by her

Two kids

Infection

Misconception

Don't step on the cracks

Or you'll fall through the surface of society

Fellas why can't you hol dback your erections?

She challenges to kiss

Thinking if she does

It will strike her trust

And her heart miss

Is to the brain

What the heart said

But hidden hearts are found by anubis

So burn the golden fleece once it's found

And let drunken sailors pee on your grave

In a wasteland walking past random clumps of hell

Don't drink anger

And kill the theif whose stolen me

Is to the brain

What the heart said

Because there's something to be said

When I die of starvation...

Eyes made of Clay

I Know a girl

Who once broke fear

And hurt pain

But like a ghost

Fell through wooden floors

And melted in the rain

Inside her are-

Glass mountains

Stone flowers

I'll always be there's

But
yet I cant's

That stop confident trains

Like superman for the day

Stripe less zebras

Cheshire cat humanist

Inside
what am I doing here's

Eye's made of clay

Love is her droit

But she denies it three times

That's three times the pain

Three times the suffering

But three times to much lassitude amounts to nothing

Sovereign glutteny

Because 2 + 2 - your third eye in eyes equals suicide

Cross your t's and dot your

Eyes made of clay

Have no fear

Have only the soft joy

In a laughter that speaks louder than words

And makes darkness cower with fear

Breathe in and try not to exhale

Until he inhales all of you

Because fre better or worse

To be unconscious than conscious

With your breathe unreceived

You said you wanted love

I said Sara! Sara!

You said we would eat lunch at the cafe

I said we'd have passion for lunch

Enough to consume a whole bears dinner

You said not to caress the flower

I said the thorns would not bleed my finger

Don't stop

Can't start

Don't stop

None the less

A feeling of strangers arises

That breaks souls

And consumes barriers

And now she's a machine

Broken down

And discombobulated

Abstintious with the individualism

Though her A.I. is often under estimated

However

They did say the only things natural found on her

Were her eyes

Made of clay

Love-Gods

- this is an old poem i made. i used to be a christian.

The whirlwind consumes the void
The soul
That is me

Insane
Planets spin out of orbit
My knees rattle and I shake my fist in fear
As the cosmos collide I prepare myself for torture when
Love grabs my collar
Pulling me out the chaos

Love chases me with androgenous gesticulation
But I runaway seeking regret
But he abandons me migrating westward

I hear gunshots ring in the air
It's love
A ways behind with a .45
But I've still got space so I hide behind the nearest masquerade

An injustice crosses my path
I cower
And it licks my feet
But it doesn't taste dirt
No
But pain and suffering
Because I've perserveered
Even though the cage bird still won't sing

The footstops of love crunch closer
Tenacity drools down my neck and shoulders so I breakout
and run
Stumbling into gang territory
Power and fame are at odds

I run through the crossfire but my attention's shot
Dragged before the two by weakness
Love appears
and strikes me to my knees and forces my head down so I
admonish respect

Let go
I commence in circles
With love close behind
Tripping into a delimma
Spraining my pride
Love quickly comes to aid
Pulls me out
And dresses the wound

Striken with grief
My throat dries
And cold drops of reproach bead my forehead
Out of nervousness I swollow dry lumps of suicide until it ties
knots in my distress

Not galvanized
I don't absquatulate from Samson's tendecies
I turn my head and continue running until the rooster crows three times
For God so loved the world
But for not so my loves can be forgotten

And its in that selffishness
That I make myself at home
Pour a cold glass of trials on the rocks
And stretch out on the couch
Challenge-less

Suddenly the sky is falling
And my problems don't seem so big anymore
Love's hand stretches and pulls me from the broken car as my world caves in

I sit on the asfault stunned
Dismantled
In anger, I start beating love

I scoop it
And start throwing blows until I break its jaw and blood seeps from a crack
in its forehead
But love doesn't flinch
It catches low with quick intentions and drops me like a bad habit

Its attacks are relentless
Tearing flesh
Breaking cartilage
I'm paralyzed
Shuttering in pain
Cursing in vain

And its then
God, Christ, and the Holy Spirit approach us
Loves forces me on my knees
And begins teaching me how to pray

Becaue poetry isn't taught
Its learned
The true mysteries of the world are the visible
Not the invisible
And God's love
Is love absolutely

Spiritual Illusion

And as the captain
Spreads his hand
To preach the plan of action
On the feild
Troops
Replace action with satisfaction
And churches bleed
Made of more than nothing
But bricks
But seeking angels who matyr
On RED hills with GREEN sticks

The sulking truth lies behind
The trash can in that alley
The one you pass by everyday
And grimace because it's funky
Walking around and seeing terrorirm
Created verbally

To crucify the disestablishment of this terrorism
To hate anti-disestablishmentarianism
Children's minds turning into war casualties
All something we can't untie
Because the choir boy talks
As the preacher philosophies

Political Affliction

A box
A maze
Amazement
Stretchout your hand and touch the surface of this wasteland
Out of my WAY man
So caughtup
So braught out
Sold out a long time ago
Some would say I sold my soul
Over some kids empty bowl

Raise your left hand not your right
Just because I can man
Starv the homeless
Cuz your runnin'n afghanistan

Like t'see someone stand up to me
A straight G
Said King Kong aint got nut'n on me
And my words?
They gotchu spinin like you was a cd
See? I'm even on tv
Could care less if you hate me
And even less if you hate that
Mm! Yea!
Come on!
And true
We say your actions speak louder than words
But that system breaks when we use nouns to kill verbs
Smiley faces stamped on
Ejaculation
Off
Political masterbation
But I won't say that I'm hate'n
Pleeaase
Can scheme acid rain
While playin game on dat mike
Cuz I'm a G?
Maaaan
I'll be chillin in dat stretched
Black car
Holla at me!

Elections

Glass soldiers on stage
Pulling the fang-riden
Smiley face words
From the anywhere the pormises victory
Statued puppets on stage
Who've murdered their owners
Engaged conversations by the doll owners crowd
The dead
Don't hesitate to spray the crowd
With a mental euthanasia if they get to rowdy

Scientific Terms

Reality- a sour tasting, corrosive substance - the opposite of freedom.

Truth- The smallest particle of a chemical element that can take part in a chemical reaction without being permanently changed.

Hope- the blanket of air that surrounds the Earth. It is thickest near the ground and gradually fades away to nothing in outerspace.

Freedom- a bitter tasting substance (and often slimy) - the opposite of a reality

Trust- the upward forces exerted by a fluid on a body in it.

Irrational- the state of an atom that has lost or gained an electron.

Marriage- the path followed by an electric current. Electricity must flow in a circuit to do useful work.

Anger- a unit of measurement for sound, it measures the loudness or volume of the sound waves.

Survival- the ratio of the mass of a body to its volume

Life- the name given to the ability to do work.

Heartache- the resistance that occurs when two objects rub together.

Happiness- the attractive central gravitational force exerted by a celestial body

Morals- incapable of mixing or attaining homogeneity.

Dating- the tendency of a body to remain at rest or stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force.

Love- often defined as the amount of matter in an object.

Religion- the force on an object due to the gravitational pull of a planet or other heavenly body

Affection- the application of a steady force upon another object.

Jacky

I once knew a girl
She was the

Glass flower holding up the vase causing cherubs to die from her sight

Her eyes
The colour of two kids

questioning their parents apathicly
It doesn't rain in heaven or hell

Star-speckled diva
With spidery fingers in your eyes

Two children playing on a blue moon
Inside you smile

A checkered smile with frowns in the gaps

You leave a taste of thunder
In the minds of those that see you in their third eye
Your real smile sending starwars through satelites
To leave Martians pondering if they can swim into your reality
Where criminals burn self-portraits

With their hearts
And pigs create masterpiece eye-drawings of queens
With their words

Two satires dancing on Hittlers grave inverse umbrellas cheek kisses legs needed to be shaved
I would like to make a roadmap of her thoughts in all directions
If you would like to find her attitude
It lies in Narcissuses reflection
While her skin is the colour of electricity
Hah! she's so stylish, she did it so it would match the colour of her being

Though it attracts he's

And makes their lips move in the words...Jacky...Jacky
Did u see the world end?

I did

Death destruction tears in children open mouths under mushroom clouds when
Two cannibals came colliding at me

I survived the wake and tried to erase everything from my head
But even though I saw the world end
Like a lingering perfume
Everything are in the word...Jacky

Jacky
They hang out with those red clad succubus
Trying to exchange the secrets of loose girl for their names
Playing with Delilah who wears thigh-high morals
And white for a lie
But you can't hide
Inside
In the end
You know you want a girl like...Jacky 
Jacky

California Woman

I know a young woman who once told me

she was

beautiful beaches under nightfall

burned by kids in play

I met this young woman from California one day

a contradicting Shiva

With further inspection

Just an androgynous soul reincarnated through each transgression

In the first life we knew each other well

Inside it

we were good friends

And then her smile became the means to my end

In the next she was Medusa

Wearing her face like a pin

Love ballads carved on the edge of bullets by the wind

A hooker taking head shots of smoke from congressmen

California woman

who once told me she was the desert sunset

Over the corpse of a beaten mob hit

California woman

Just an androgynous soul seeking hosts

but we're all crying flowers who echo its life the most

In my third

I play unseen character Whose boldness is pretty gross

Until the last page

Where

Alone

I carry mirrors by my side and play charades

while in search of a pheanix to dance gambits over their grave

In Hers

She's a roaring pheanix spilling blaze over carrion in its wake

California Woman

Rippled hair between her teeth

as she pumps smiles into her tears with dirty needles

used to carve wounds into desert heat

A little girl senseless to car detection playing ball inside the street

California Woman

your seal of patriotism is a neon sign tinged affection

The frowning, clown face resurrection

A brush stroke and canvas

Forced to bleed themselves

Until they accidentally bleed their own slipshod grown erections

Eat your fill of my suicide

It's trash after this reflection

It's all glitter and body paint

No one wears clothes anymore

In the land of perfection

Scattered words, itchy, dry-humped frontal lobes, and

protection

California Girl

California Girl
With rippled hair
Between your teeth
Camaraderie
Your seal of patriotism
California Girl
Your life cadence
Carves wounds into April showers

Lay on your back
And spill childish frivolity
With the thunder of maturity
As contradicting
As the Shiva you are
The sun sets in the east
While the tide reverses
Eat your fill of my depression
It's been a good harvest